Tulum – So Much More than a Pretty Instagram Picture

How Tulum went from being “Meh” to “Never Leaving”

Tulum, the impossibly dreamy subject of all the coolest social media accounts, was the first of four places we planned to stay on our 10-day trip to Mexico.  We were dying to see these views and experience this idyllic beach town, but would we be disappointed?

We had just a few days to make the most of it. This was the sister part of the trip to celebrate Patti’s 50^th birthday.  We planned to do all the sisbehaving, woo-woo and girly stuff in Tulum.  Plus hike ruins, and swim cenotes, and cram as much as we could into the first four days before my husband arrived and we moved into beach and margarita mode.

Getting to Tulum

We rented a car, and then promptly freaked out about driving a car in Mexico.  All those rumors of “shake downs” and bribing police who preyed on tourists.  But we had things to see and do, many miles to cover and no built in taxi friends, so we rented a car.  When you book online, rental cars are insanely cheap in Mexico.  When you show up to pick it up, you get hammered with crazy expensive insurance fees.  But, got the car picked up and we were off for the 90 minute drive to Tulum.

Sister Side Note (ssn) – this is the first appearance of “My New Mexican friend, Oscar”, into our journey. That’s how he referred to himself. Foreshadowing…Oscar plays a great supporting actor role!

It’s straight freeway (Mexican freeway, not US freeway, remember this), so easy peasy, right?  Except the speed limit keeps jumping up and down, and being scared-to-be-driving-in-a-foreign-country tourists, we obey them like a mo-fo.  And we are the only ones that do.  Speed dips to 40 kph, everyone else is still going 100, but we do 40.  And Peggy is stressed out.  And we are starving.

First Impression

But we get to Tulum, and head right to the heart of town for dinner.  And we are left with a feeling of “Eh, this is it?”  I mean, it’s a simple town, nothing wrong with it; basically, the main strip is some rundown closed-down places, some upscale cater-to-tourist looking places, and some tourist trap souvenir shops. We were both left with a feeling of “people fall all over each other for this”?

After a little FUBAR with the rental car key, in which we sent new friend Oscar and the rental car place into a bit of a tizzy, and stressed ourselves out to tears, we skipped food and just headed to the hotel.

ssn – we had a little trouble finding the entrance to the hotel road. Cue encounter #1 with the policia. Haha, I was terrified but they were super kind and asked if we were lost. Turns out, our hotel is behind the gated entrance to the Zona Arqueologica (Tulum Ruins).

Staying in Tulum

The Mezzanine. Oh, my little slice of heaven!! How do you realistically describe paradise?  We were greeted with limited parking out front, but there was a sign out front saying “reserved for Peggy Zipperer”! Security outside helped us park, grabbed our bags, and escorted us to David (say it with an accent Dah-veed).  So very friendly and helpful!  We were greeted like old friends that they had been waiting for all day!

Upon checking in, we were presented with an assortment of tiny bars of soap and asked which we would prefer for our room, we were given a list of scents to put in our diffuser for the evening turndown service, and they noted how we took our coffee in the morning.

ssn – the staff of Mezzanine continued throughout our stay to greet us like family. Everytime we met someone new, they were all “Oh, you’re Peggy & Patti!” Like they are briefed on every guest!

Our room, omg, I can not gush enough about our room, crisp white linens, and wood accents.  The Mezzanine provides each room with yoga mats, extra sun hats, and beach bag & towels, along with organic soap products and bug spray.

They had evening hot tea and homemade truffles (Mayan chocolate!) waiting in our room for us.  We had a quick meal out on the patio listening to the sound of the waves, and then took our travel weary butts to bed. 

Our First Glorious Morning

We wake for sunrise over the Caribbean, but before even getting out of bed we can hear the waves crashing outside our room. And set right outside our door is a thermos of coffee, with our cream and raw sugar!

We proceeded to our thrones of judgement, where Peggy proves that this is not a stellar idea, and we decide to explore our little hotel property and find the best view of the sunrise.  This turns out to be the swings under the restaurant patio.  And it is gorgeous.  Fantastic colors, and sounds and smells.

The local workers come out to rake the beach and pick up garbage, it was so nice to see how they care for their local area.

Massages

We could have chilled out here all morning, but we had to head off to our prescheduled massage with Marco at Animamente.  Is there a better way to start off a birthday vacation than with a massage? We chose this because, aside from the 5-star review, it was a massage that centered more on energy and chakra alignment to support your overall health than just working out the muscle kinks and knots.

Marco was fantastic, caring, and loving;  truly gifted in his craft.  We left there two big mush balls, with a fully cleansed energetic system.  But starving mush balls.

ssn – Marco was an incredible human, very intuitive and passionate about his craft. But as I look back on this experience, I giggle that my memory compares him to Salvadore, the darling yoga instructor from Couples Retreat. He is that kind of “in your space” but in a totally professional and beneficial way!

Amazing Lunch

In town, way up on our list of places we had to eat was Camello’s (or more properly: El Camello, Jr).

We ordered the medium mixto ceviche – shrimp, fish, octopus, snails – it was huge!  It was also, hands down, the best ceviche we have ever had.  Well balanced flavors, and so fresh.  I ordered a mojito, and again, the most apt description is “well-balanced”; the perfect amount of lime, rum, and mint.  So perfect.  Peggy opted for a beer, she doesn’t even drink beer, but I guess it just felt right! We split the shrimp tacos, and loaded them down with Camello’s amazing chipotle mayo!

Then the acoustic street musician started playing The Beatles, and we were sold!

Sold on a recovery nap!!

ssn – but first, we had to take a little drive down the beach road through Zona Hotelera to see what the hype was all about! Turns out, “the hype” was well founded! We were both oohing & aahing and pointing and loving every inch of the beachy, happy-hippy vibe! So.damn.cute. But this damn rental car and no parking…we decided to go back to the hotel, ditch the car and taxi back down there.

Did Someone Say Mezcal?

ssn – I don’t think the nap ever happened…however, we did shower & rejuvenate before getting fresh margaritas from the hotel bar. This is where we meet our bartender, Marco. Marco gives us an impromptu Mezcal lesson & tasting. It was fantastic. Different combinations of mezcal with citrus & salts (salt, Tajin, grasshopper salt). Marco explains, good Mezcal is meant to be treated like a lady…loved slowly, with respect and “besitos”!

Birthday Celebration

We made reservations for RosaNegra for my birthday at the suggestion of Peggy’s New Mexican friend Oscar.  RosaNegra is the best place in Tulum for special occasions. The staff was amazingly attentive, Ivan was just on it for whatever we needed.

They serve these delicious cheese popovers like normal places serve chips and salsa!  We had the most incredible Caesar salad (and I don’t particularly care for Caesar salad), salmon carpaccio which was just melt in your mouth amazing, lobster tacos, and for dessert, a chocolate sphere with fresh fruit, tres leche ice cream AND A CELEBRATION SPARKLER FOR MY BIRTHDAY!!! It was so fantastic!

And so much for our post-dinner plans of drinking it up, we were full and happy and caught a taxi back to our lovely Mezzanine. 

Side note to this:  We stopped at Mur Mur for a pre-dinner cocktail across the street, one of those travel photo worthy bars with swings.  I thought it was so cool that they shut down (as do most businesses) from 5-6 to allow their staff time to have dinner before serving others.  LOVED THIS!

Tulum Ruins

The Mezzanine is on the stretch of road that leads to the Tulum Ruins.  We decided that we would head to the ruins first thing in the morning, a short 1.6 miles down the road and we thought we would just drive.

Luckily we had Alejandra, our fantastic morning concierge, who says that there is no parking lot down the road our hotel is on, and cars can’t get into the Ruin area from this road, but Mezzanine has bicycles we can rent.  Yes, just sit with that image for a moment, two plus size middle aged women on bikes, in the heat, for a mile and a half.  It was just as glorious as it sounds.

ssn – Did she really just call us plus size middle age??? I am plus size offended!

The Tulum Ruins were fantastic.  Mayan history is so fascinating, a temple to the Wind God, a Temple of the Sea, and the family living and working areas.  I am fascinated by the belief systems of other cultures! It was just beautiful!  It is absolutely worth a visit, even in the heat.

After we biked our butts back to the hotel (with a lot of “I think I can, I think I can”) and showered, and then convinced ourselves that we should absolutely experience the Mayan Clay Spa.

Tulum Zona Hotelera

Mayan Clay Massage

Although hesitant that Mayan Clay Spa was a tourist trap, we decided that it must be experienced, just to be able to say we did it. Down in the Zona Hotelera area of Tulum, it is a little tropical paradise spa that also has a public bathhouse. For the massage, they take you to a little private changing area. You shower first, then head for your own little Shala.  I lay down on the table and immediately think “this was a mistake, omg, how can I get out of here, this is gonna suck”.  I was sweaty and gross feeling laying on this sheet, and couldn’t even fathom being smeared with clay. 

Then Wendy started the massage. And HOLY MAYAN HAPPINESS. The clay is pulled from these 5 gallon buckets of water, so it’s more like a slurry being washed over you.  Instant coolness, instant relaxation.  And unlike other massages, when she hit a tender point, it eased up each time she worked on it.  So if you have a tight spot that hurts to touch, it actually gets better and better.  And then you are a big muddy mess who tries to roll over and the whole sheet goes with you.  They mask your hair, your face, your body (no boobs, dangit) with the luxurious clay.

My biggest regret ended up being not having a camera handy for your viewing hilarity. It was worth every penny and every second, and I already want another one.  My skin has never felt so smooth, and it lasted for days!!

Taking in the Tulum Beach Sights

So with mud still stuck in my ears (yes, they let you shower after), we took a stroll down the beach road, looking for a perfect beach bar.  So, as I originally stated 1500 words ago, we were a little downhearted at Tulum City. . .but this whole 3 mile stretch of beach road, full of restaurants and bars, and bodegas, and spas.  Way more touristy, sure, but also so so cute and fun. 

Le Zebra

We landed at Le Zebra, where we had a pitcher of mango margaritas and just enjoyed the beach vibe and music and fun!  Le Zebra has a great atmosphere with private in-the-sand-tables, and a fantastically fun and energetic outdoor beach bar (which we couldn’t get a seat at, but watched with longing looks hoping a seat would clear up).

ssn – this may be a good place to mention that EVERY place observed covid protocols. Masks everywhere (streets, businesses, taxis but not the beach), temperature checks at each business, hand sanitizer galore (and I should warn you that it does not absorb in the humidity so that’s a little gross) and mostly distanced seating.

A mariachi band showed up, chips and guacamole showed up, and then a storm started showing up on the horizon (see early post about surviving a hurricane, and subsequent Mexico blog part 3 regarding tropical storms), so we grabbed a taxi back to the Mezzanine (about 10 min away from this beachy tourist strip).

Diamante K

Well, almost back to Mezzanine. First a stop just short of the Mezzanine at Diamante K for their restaurant and bar called Casa Maria.  It was on my TripAdvisor list of places to go.  And it was perfect.  Just like the picture.  A big ole hut with mood lighting, right on the water, with Mojitos, and acoustic music, fun low-key crowd (not the big party spot of the beach road).  Basically, our dream spot for hanging out.

And then the storm rolled in, thunder and lightning created the perfect ambiance and in turn created the most perfect end to last night in Tulum.

For other adventures on this trip

• Yucatan Peninsula
• Surviving a Category 1 Hurricane
• Playa del Carmen
• Isla Holbox Day 1
• Isla Holbox Day 2